@mammaloves I'm torn between being super annoyed and wondering what the fuck a "kaffeeklatsch" is. See? TORN.
— Sammanthia #10542211928 6 days ago
So much for thinking I'd get a little sympathy for being sick. This is what I get: "Wow. You really look like shit."
— Sammanthia #10399248829 1 week ago
RT @themuskrat: Fuck the red carpet. Frank the tank is on TBS. <----- LMAO.
— Sammanthia #10145792710 2 weeks ago
@undomesticdiva I'll bet Oprah wouldn't have pulled that shit.
— Sammanthia #8880634370 on February 9, 2010
I'll bet Martha Stewart doesn't have to put up with this shit.
— Sammanthia #8877439340 on February 9, 2010
If I get one more follower promoting teeth whitener, I'm going to lose. my. shit.
— Sammanthia #5877370070 on November 19, 2009
Fuck the wine. We're having Kool-Aid.
— Sammanthia #5872102727 on November 19, 2009
Whoever it was that came up with Wii Active is one cruel son of a bitch.
— Sammanthia #5782454907 on November 16, 2009
FINALLY editing pictures of my mom's wedding and no amount of Photoshop is going to hide the fact that I look like a fucking doily.
— Sammanthia #5605841421 on November 10, 2009
@childsplayx2 I don't have a problem with that, just this particular teacher. Bitch.
— Sammanthia #5494045619 on November 6, 2009
@gamingwithbaby I don't care if that shit's on fire after 30 minutes.
— Sammanthia #5271278434 on October 29, 2009
My uncle posted pictures of all of us at Thanksgiving in '99. That shit is *legendary*, people. It also means I can never run for congress.
— Sammanthia #5271029434 on October 29, 2009
@babitosdad Have I been replaced? You fickle, fickle bastard.;)
— Sammanthia #5246363382 on October 28, 2009
I'm getting a little turned on listening to Leo. That's fucked up.
— Sammanthia #3278780733 on August 12, 2009
@3giraffes PS My favorite episode is the one in the cab when Charlotte gets freaked out by up the butt. Cracks my shit UP.
— Sammanthia #3064987160 on July 31, 2009
@undomesticdiva I'm all over that shit.
— Sammanthia #3064853437 on July 31, 2009
@superkeely I got through most of my reader and then I finally gave up and marked the rest as read. I am a shitty blog friend.
— Sammanthia #3063570218 on July 31, 2009
@mommy_wins @undomesticdiva @thestilettomom @ScaryMommy I'm Marie Callender's bitch.
— Sammanthia #3059562405 on July 31, 2009
@AnissaMayhew Fuck Menudo. Bring back New Edition! They were the ORIGINAL boy band.
— Sammanthia #2953613268 on July 31, 2009
@badassdadblog "Bitch" wasn't the look I was going for. Must. Change. Now.
— Sammanthia #2937666034 on July 30, 2009
RT @bhaddad: Goodnight Moon, You Shiny-assed Bitch #failedchildrensbooktitles <--- SNORT
— Sammanthia #2916578852 on July 29, 2009
Whenever Mark is home on vacation the house totally goes to shit. I really need him to go back to work.;)
— Sammanthia #2675945838 on July 16, 2009
@jenbshaw Bitch. I'm going to have to walk around next year squishing my boobs together just so people know I has them.;)
— Sammanthia #2641343286 on July 14, 2009
My kids would seriously eat shit if it were covered in sugar.
— Sammanthia #2641001392 on July 14, 2009
@AnissaMayhew The sad thing is? I'm not even making this shit up. I jacked up my neck and it STILL bothers me. This was months ago.
— Sammanthia #2509006647 on July 6, 2009
@bjhenry I just tried and I shit you not, Twitter won't let me. Oh well, at least it's buried now. Thanks! I didn't even know it was there.
— Sammanthia #2505559636 on July 6, 2009
@redneckmommy Stop. You're making me feel like a shit for buying M a cell phone.
— Sammanthia #2259527187 on June 20, 2009
@JenMaselli If it makes you feel any better, I think it's hilarious. Of course, it isn't my kid calling people a stupid fuck. Yet.
— Sammanthia #2259441283 on June 20, 2009
@superkeely Feedburner can be a moody bitch. I doubt that it's anything you did.
— Sammanthia #2246756899 on June 19, 2009
@TentCamper Which experience? The orgasmic brownies or telling Anna Paquin to follow the fucking geese?
— Sammanthia #2173506664 on June 14, 2009
@smartassredhead I've never seen it and the only thing I know of her is she was in Fly Away Home, so I'd be all "FOLLOW THE FUCKING GEESE!".
— Sammanthia #2172051313 on June 14, 2009
@jenandtonica And I'll bet Kate Winslet looks stunning, even when she's screaming and her make-up is all jacked up. Bitch.
— Sammanthia #2098335653 on June 9, 2009
@alotofnothing Does that mean I have to camouflage swear words with #@!@? FUCK.
— Sammanthia #2083858905 on June 8, 2009
@al_pal I need to find the free shit.;)
— Sammanthia #2029247358 on June 4, 2009
I went out and got my tattoo fixed tonight. It hurt like a bitch and I ruined 2 tank tops. Totally worth it.
— Sammanthia #2011077215 on June 2, 2009
I scored 87% on the "How Stressed Are You?" quiz. WELL, NO SHIT.
— Sammanthia #2003121763 on June 2, 2009
@CarmaSez @Chippewa29 If Craftsman came out with something, I'd be all over that shit.;)
— Sammanthia #1985553416 on May 31, 2009
@undomesticdiva You'd better be twitpicin' that shit.
— Sammanthia #1965709130 on May 29, 2009
@TentCamper I'm still thinking. It HAS to be good! He gives me shit *all the time* but he's hilarious so I can't even hold it against him.;)
— Sammanthia #1932349167 on May 26, 2009
@avapidblonde Jealous. Bitch.;)
— Sammanthia #1887835158 on May 22, 2009
If M isn't home tonight he's going to come home tomorrow to find all of his shit on the lawn. I'm just kidding. Sorta.
— Sammanthia #1875198300 on May 21, 2009
@jenbshaw "*I* want it to be a surprise because it's more special that way." Then she looked at me all judgey. Bitch.
— Sammanthia #1864632210 on May 20, 2009
I just overheard C's friend tell him, "Did you know that you can get an erection thinking about girls?". Shit.
— Sammanthia #1862990962 on May 20, 2009
@churchpunkmom People still talk about it and we've been married for 13 years. He's in deep shit when he gets home.;)
— Sammanthia #1861679785 on May 20, 2009
@churchpunkmom I thought it was snow cones and diet Pepsi. It's not? Shit.
— Sammanthia #1861164806 on May 20, 2009
@mochadad Never marry a man who calls you his bitch. I think I read that in a fortune cookie once.
— Sammanthia #1851780663 on May 19, 2009
These are going to be some awesome cupcakes. Betty Crocker is my bitch.
— Sammanthia #1851639325 on May 19, 2009
I will never EVER buy another plastic patio set. I could've bought another one for what it's costing me in Magic Erasers to clean the bitch.
— Sammanthia #1850085543 on May 19, 2009
Fuck the bark chips.
— Sammanthia #1847121556 on May 19, 2009
